This is NOT front page...

I'm rather tired of my life becoming fodder for the masses - perhaps I should never be famous.

Of course, I'm being hypocritical; after all, I'm the one who sits here and writes different rants and ramblings about the state of my life right now. But honestly, who really reads this apart from the random stumbler who happens to come upon it?

What irks me is when private email conversations make it onto someone else's blog. If I wanted things to become a public talking point, I would post a bulletin or send a mass email telling everybody in the world what only one person needs to hear.

That being said...I extended an olive branch to Brian, in the form of an apology (as usual). And as usual, he accepted my apology and then found it appropriate to reciprocate. So now we're going to meet for coffee one day next week to hash and rehash all the issues that should have been resolved a month ago.

I just want this to be over. I mean, is it worth the cost to keep a friendship? Does it really even matter whether he likes me or hates me? C'mon, he didn't seem to think that I was good enough, and I wasn't happy with him either, so what's the point in trying to maintain a connection that fell apart a long time ago? Unfortunately, as much as I want this to be over I want it to end on a somewhat higher note than that on which the drama began.

Too long I've been afraid of losing love I guess I've lost...well if that's love, it comes at much too high a cost...

Mostly, I just want this resolved so I can move forward and enjoy the time I have with Chris. This entire situation has been making me sick and cranky, and it's becoming more and more difficult to control my temper. Speaking of which, I'm at his house (again, as usual) and ready to sleep. Perhaps that's where all this angst comes from, late night eating and not enough sleep.

God save me.